Wednesday 31 July 2013

No way… you cannot justify rape…



By Kenneth Juror | Kenya
      
Some months ago we were treated to allegations of unnatural acts being perpetuated by girls in Mombasa with a dog. This was season 1 episode 1 with its viewership ending sooner than it started. The sequel is still on but this time round, men versus domesticated animals which is in season 1 episode 3. The first was with a pregnant cow in Kiambu, a hen in Nyeri and the third in Murang’a where it was four men and a donkey tied to a tree. 

A cock killed a hen in Nyeri the joke goes.

It is although very unfortunate that people are making generalization statements which might later develop into stereotypes against men from these areas. 

            Last weekend a man in Kisumu was mercilessly beaten for raping a 5 year girl. Previous to this incident, a report by the National Council for Population and Development indicated that the former Nyanza province led in the number of teenage pregnancies followed by the Coastal region at 27% and 26% respectively.

Laptops, PC’s…

            Arguments have been thrown to “justify” why it was “better” to have teenage pregnancies around than engage in bestiality acts. Another school of thought argued that rape is better to bestiality!

I was perplexed to hear these from men, some well schooled.

None of these acts is better to the other as they are all heinous. How does one feel inserting a USB disc in a slot not meant for one? How would you feel if someone inserted theirs in your PC or laptop?
There will be a plethora of risks involved first, they would be pushing a memory stick into a slot that cannot fit but still soldier on, eventually your computer will break. Secondly, the risk of transferring viruses, quite literally, could completely shut down the functions of your computer (pun intended) among many other risks.
It is so wrong that someone can rape your daughter then later try “to justify” it. What if it was your mother, sister, aunt, cousin, grandmother etc how would you feel? These are men doing such.

Are we really men?

            Before the advent of the family unit many years back; men and women lived in separate homesteads far apart from each other. Men would raid women’s homesteads and rape them. As years went on women got tired of the constant horrifying sexual raids and each started identifying a man who she would sleep with and take care of , on the other hand men respected a woman who had identified a man. This was to reduce the harrowing ordeal that defines rape.
Men being jealous they way they are to date, they only wanted to be with the woman he had last time and a fist fight would resolve the difference on who was “there” earlier. The woman had the final word.
Convincingly, men took one woman after the other to their homesteads so that they would be away from other men who may raid when he is not aware exposing her to unknown danger.

Chop off…    
       
            The Sexual Offences Act of 2006 popularly known as the Njoki Ndung’u bill before being legislated it had propositions that a sexual offender’s organ be chopped off if found guilty, rape in this case, among other offences outlined in the Act. 

This proposition did not see the light the light of day.

Section 2 of the Act “A person guilty of an offence under this section is liable upon conviction to imprisonment for a term of not less than ten years but which may be enhanced to imprisonment for life”.

In conclusion no man would like to see his daughter, aunt, mother, sister, grandmother, friend etc being raped same applies to the boy child (sodomy). Why then engage in something that you would hate being done to your family? Why do it to someone else’s daughter/ son?

I beg to be schooled on this.

Tuesday 23 July 2013

The slum princess



Kenneth Juror | Kenya
        
               She strode in her red peplum dress with a matching 7-inch stilettos elevating her to get a bird's view of the people’s heads. She had long, well-kept hair that ran through her mountainous gluteus maximus. She always loved holding it in the middle of her head, girls call it ponytail.
She adorned shiny luxurious jewels that kept many people in the estate asking themselves how she got such expensive jewellery.

The base
           
            Boys in the estate always loved ogling at this goddess who despite her jaw dropping beauty still preferred using matatu to and from the search of the usual daily bread.
One Sunday morning just as many were preparing to go to church, the local one which had its sound system loud enough inviting all to attend their services.
The rusty-iron sheet church was tearing apart due to the loud music; it was paving way for another permanent brick walled structure being built 50 meters away. The voice from the public address system was louder as the MPESA number was being read out; contrary, the same voice went the other direction when holding prayers!
            Away from the church, she was all out looking like an Aphrodite, the Goddess of love & beauty and daughter of Zeus in ancient mythology that was identified with Roman Venus. She wore a printed maxi-dress with a matching pair of sandals and a clutch bag to complete the look.
The base as the boys popularly referred to the estate was characterized by narrow alleys with used water meant for pipes finding its way in between the rusty mud-walled houses. They chatted the day out some going to construction sites that dotted the other side of town however, those who remained behind either sniffed and puffed away their lunch or drunk it all together.
            She did a hop-step and jump over the narrow murky filled water with her dress highly held to avoid it from licking this colored water. For a while her designer cologne was overwhelmed by the putrid stench from the streams and overflowing latrines that the base had.

Her return…
           
            After the church service boys who were doing their usual; playing cards and sniffing some contraband items, upon seeing her they stopped to ogle and stare at this unrivaled queen of the base. Some of them were too drunk to see her, one of the boys said “eyii mbona leo amekonda hivi” (today she seems slender) while the other said “yenyewe” (I concur) then he fell with a thud. Whereas others were dropping and struggling to be on their feet another bunch was busy fighting the stupor to find their elusive footing.
She continued walking unperturbed of the happenings around her as this was usual in the base, her Bible on the right hand and her red clutch bag firmly in her left. Suddenly, a crowd of boys and girls emerged from the direction she was heading; on noticing trouble she dropped her Bible and ran the opposite direction with the crowd not relenting, hot in her pursuit. As she ran she kept asking herself what she had done wrong.
She held her dress high up to enable her run fast, just as she navigated a corner she was hit with a shovel on the back that felt like a mild thunder which pushed her to the ground faster.
The crowd formed around her carrying all sorts of weapons as she writhed in pain. 

“Leave her alone” I shouted from the middle of the crowd, all eyes shifted on me as I walked towards her. A dread locked guy who seemed to be pulling the shots said “We will teach her a lesson she will never forget” as he unzipped his jeans that had seen better days giving way on the knees. Two other boys unzipped as the girls cheered on!

            She got herself from the ground, tightly she clang on me telling me “please please help me!”
Someone hit my back with an iron rod sending me to the ground instantly. She screamed so loudly in my ear that I woke up.

Hey, get back to work or continue studying if a student.

It was just a dream.                
           

Thursday 18 July 2013

Thanksgiving



Kenneth Juror | Kenya

            “Service to man is service to God”; these are the words by Charles Eliot Norton, an American educator and humanitarian who said,” They serve God well who serve His creatures”. The noblest and the best of God’s creations is indeed, man.

Previously on the formative stages of this platform I asked you on the ways of how you would give back to the communities you came from, I basically don’t require an answer to this as I believe you know yourself much better than I do.

This was the basis of my visit to One Heart Children’s Home that is located in Kapsoya, Eldoret around 3km from Eldoret town near another internationally renowned children’s home – SOS Children’s Village.
                                     
We visited this children’s home on Saturday 13th July 2013, in appreciation of the much that God had done in each one of us. 
We went for thanksgiving just as it in Galatians 6:2 carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.  

History of the home

One Heart Children’s Home was founded by the Destiny Church in Australia, Mr. and Mrs Juma were brought in as foster parents, later on Mrs Judith Mutheu was brought in to help its foster parents as the number of children increased. 

The home has 42 children, 21 girls and 21 boys who stay in two different houses. Mr. and Mrs Juma are the parents to boys where as Mrs Mutheu and her husband are the parents to girls. Mr. Lawrence Mafabi a Ugandan national is the manager of the institution which together with other workers run this institution that sits on approximately ¾ of an acre.

            The sponsors of this children’s home, Destiny Church in Australia, have done an excellent job going by the reception we received from the children and workers.
We were informed that some of the children were street children who were abandoned by their parents at very tender ages, a majority of them were from single parents who were killed during the 2007/2008 post election violence. 

I however cannot forget a Tanzanian girl who narrated very memorable memory verses.
                                                                             Play time
            We can all volunteer our service to the childrens’ homes that dot the country in the best way you can either through washing for them their clothes or still pay someone to do the washing for them, play with these angels. Even the Holy Book recognizes the importance of children in our community in Luke 18:16 But Jesus called the children to him and said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.  

            The challenge to you reading this is to make this world a better place through community service. It won’t cost you a dime just a smile and a willing heart.
                                                           
                                                              A chit chat session
 

Friday 12 July 2013

Look what my baby’s done to me!


Last year, on 31st July at 2.00am I checked into Nairobi hospital labor ward. After 36 weeks, my journey had come to an end and I was about start another. I was apprehensive. I had had 36 weeks of mostly emotional turmoil after a near miscarriage coupled with wondering whether I had made the right choice to keep the baby. Yes, I admit it; I did entertain thoughts of terminating the pregnancy- so now I do not judge. When you wear those shoes of having a child outside wedlock, you will know what I’m talking about. It is never easy. However, deep down, I knew I would not go through with it plus I have an amazing network of friends and an even more wonderful mother and they made me feel that I would make it. (Thanks a mil guys!)

Later that morning at 10.30am I held in my arms the most fragile, beautiful gift one could have. I was a mixture of relief, excitement, joy and apprehension- but mostly reliefJ. When my doctor gave me my baby he asked me to pray for her but I was too exhausted so he took her in his arms and said a powerful prayer over her life. I was left in tears and I experienced a kind of peace that I had not had for a while and right there and then, I knew everything would be fine. (God bless him!) I had made the right choice.

Fast forward to today. 20 days to her 1st birthday. I look back and I stand in awe.  I would not have made it this far without God. The journey has not been without hiccups but the good outweighs the bad and that is what really matters. I realize that children are a reward from the Lord.
Through this journey I have learnt a great deal of things. Here are the top 5:

1)      I have learnt patience- Can all the parents say Amen! If you will not learn anything else from your baby, trust me, you will learn patience. Patience for the long nights, patience for the time she will cry and you have no clue what to do. I have become so patient it shocks me. Another feather to my hat J

2)     I see God’s love with a different set of eyes- I never quite grasped what unconditional love is until baby K came along. I love her with that kind of love that I can’t explain. I even worry that I may not have more love left for another.  I now know what it means when God says that He does not love us any less even when we sin. I am confident that there is not a thing that my daughter would do that would make me love her any less. Nothing. This is the carnal me speaking. Imagine how a Holy, Sovereign God loves you. It is a beautiful kind of love.

3)     I take myself less seriously- Sure this sounds wrong especially with the new responsibilities of parenthood. Maybe I should say I have learnt to let loose. Babies are carefree.  A good time to see this is when a baby falls sick. The minute they feel slightly better, they’re up and playing around again. How about us? When we encounter an obstacle we may be gloomy for weeks. Then we carry on the negative energy for such a long time and infect others as well. Here’s the secret to a good life-remember it’s never that serious. Never.

4)     SMILEJ- You’ll look better, you’ll feel better and people will want to be around you more often. There’s nothing more enchanting than a baby’s warm inviting smile and laughter. Ah! It’s magical. The purity and sincerity in it will capture your heart. Little wonder her dad wants to be around her all the time- she melts his heart.

5)     Lastly, the one year with my daughter has taught me how to forgive myself. Every day, I realize what a blessing she is in my life.  I am forgiving myself and healing and I am learning to love again without the fear of getting hurt again. As she makes her baby steps, I am making some too in my own special way and I am grateful that I can now see the beauty in my life.

I will conclude this with a prayer that is in the connect series we are studying in church:
“Father I thank you because children are a heritage from you. In deed the fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has a quiver full of them; they shall not be ashamed, but shall speak with their enemies in the gate. (Psalm 127:3-5)”

Happy parenting to those with children!

Follow the writer on twitter @Sonirakel